The three kings finally made it...

The three kings finally made it. It is a nail biter every year, whether they will get to stable and the manger in time. Well, in time for what? I think the story of the kings and their long journey is the story I liked the most from in churchy childhood. And I remember being disappointed that they weren't at all mentioned on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day and the two weeks it took them to show up was an eternity for a child. The three Kings with the mysterious gifts who travel into the ordinary life with a scent of Oriental East. With extraordinariness. What is myrrh anyway, and what is it good for? It sounds very special, though and they don't seem bothered by being so late. Or are they perhaps right on time? 

I also feel late this year. As if the time between Advent 1st and Twelfth Night wasn't enough. When New Year's came, 2017 was difficult to summarise. I chose one pic per mont, put them together and realised it had been all and everything, impossible to make sense of.

We travelled a lot in Sweden during all seasons and as well as we saw frozen waterfalls and the Nordic light, we also hiked a few mountains with views like nothing else. We visited friends and we created us a new home in the southern part of Sweden. I also worked tremendously much to get my company rolling and found an amazingly social choir, who absolutely enjoys to sing, but most of all loves to hang out. And the trip to Africa became an incredible adventure I still think of every day. Flying a Cessna from Pretoria to Namibia, Botswana and then back to South Africa, was probably the most exhausting thing I have ever done. And I didn't even fly it... Beautiful landscapes, amazing places and so many wild animals that I hardly knew existed. But also a stressful amount of administration, a broken plane brake, a wing flap that got stuck and an emergency landing among the donkeys, horses and cows. We ended up spending 24 hours illegally in Botswana and we met people who had heard of our bisarre trip before they met us. 

I remember spending last New Year's with friends, deciding that 2017 should be about patience and courage. And I really think it has been. I have been courageous while co-piloting over the Namibian deserts and the Okavango-delta, singing a solo, making new business connections and diving the fresh water caves in Yucatan. I have also been patient when things haven't worked out as planned. When I walked home crying from a meeting with a conductor and representants from her choir, when it felt strugglesome and doubtful to build a business, when we were stuck in the dreadful city of Maun or when I lost my grandmother and all the pain that came with it. 

The three kings finally made it to the newborn child and I finally made sense of the strange and intense year of 2017. And what I realised the other day, is that unnecessary many things hit our self-worth in a way that isn't reasonable. For if I have a look at every single situation I have left with a sense of inadequacy this year, I have later realised that most of those cases were about other circumstances. Another person had a bad day, I wasn't prepared enough, I hadn't received the information I needed or just something as bad timing. Sometimes it is valid to feel inadequate, so we can improve and change. But to let it hit our self-worth is just unnecessary. 

So, friends out there; I am a little late, because this journey took some time. But the star to follow for 2018 is to be very cautious around what we allow to affect our worth. Follow the star. As simple as that. You might be a little late, but you will get there, eventually. Right on time.